We had our weekly check up today. We usually go on Monday's but Bryce has been sick this week so we had to reschedule for today. Brayden's heart rate was 143 today. It was 163 last week and 180 the week before. We're not sure exactly what this means, if anything. 143 is still considered "normal." We had to bring Bryce to our appointment today because he was too sick to stay at Lisa's. We have never brought him before, and probably won't again if we can help it. He did really well, I just want to protect him from such grown-up things. Our Doctor was amazing and let us leave right after the ultrasound. We will meet with him next week. Our ultrasound tech was very sweet today. We were asking her questions and I told her that I have a lot of questions that I want answered. We know that Brayden has trisomy 13, but what does that mean for him? I want to know exactly what is wrong with my baby. Even though that will be painful, I have to know in order to settle some of my fears, or worse, confirm some of my fears. When I told that to our ultra sound tech, she looked at me and said, "I'm beginning to see some changes, but we'll talk about it next week." One might read that and think that could possibly mean good news, but the way she said it scared me. So now, I await to hear this news next week. I am preparing myself for another traumatic Monday.
"As you do not know the path of the wind, or how the body is formed in a mother's womb, so you cannot understand the work of God, the Maker of all things." Ecclesiastes 11:5
You may have looked into these organizations already but String of Pearls is a wonderful organization for those whose children have a adverse prenatal diagnosis.
ReplyDeletehttp://stringofpearlsonline.org/
Sufficient Grace Ministries also has materials for grieving families. I'm a board member for this organization and a recipient of their products so I can attest to how wonderful it is. Kelly, the founder, is a beautiful and loving person.
http://www.sufficientgrace.net/
Have you found any Trisomy 13 support groups? I know that I was able to find an anencephaly support group thru yahoo that put me in touch with other moms who had walked the same path and they were so, so helpful to me in preparing for Carleigh.
Praying for you daily Deanna.
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